No Man's Ocean...500 Days

No Man's Ocean: When we first quit, it is like leaving the shore line with a vast ocean ahead of us. We board our quit boat and set off on our journey not sure of what's ahead. Fear is looming but we know we have to leave to start fresh. It's tough to go and seek new lands and new possibilities in life. At first we want to return because we can still see the shore and all that we left behind. 

The cigs were our so called "friends" staring and calling back at us from shore. But we know they only offer negativity and bad health. If we go back, we know nothing will change and our efforts will be for not. We will have given up on our voyage, never giving ourselves the chance to see what we are capable of and where we could end up. 

The fear can come and try to sweep us back to shore. To me it's more like no man's ocean than no man's land, and the cravings are the waves beating at us over and over again...but if we get out far enough, we make it past the breakers and find we aren't alone. 

Others have found their own private Islands, and built new homes and new foundations. The waters are calmer and our friends help us find our own way, help us find new sources for survival. They lead us to our own secret lands where anything is possible. We have the chance to start new and explore life's possibilities with a new found freedom that staying on shore could never offer. 

I feel I have been in no man's ocean, but I know I am arriving at my destination. It doesn't happen over night. The natural journey of our quit builds the foundation of our new lives, our new homes on our own private Islands. We stand amongst all the people that gave a damn while we were gritting through the ups and downs of our recovery. 

We must stay resilient and see this thing through. We must live in the future every day. We must have faith and believe that we will reach our destination before we are there. Use your imagination and keep seeing what you are not now but what you will become! That's the only way to get off the shore of addiction and on the island of freedom. 

Adam

"Do Not Disturb! Brilliant Minds at Work!"

I don’t know why but this man (Wayne Dyer) speaks to me so well. I’m sure he connects with a lot of people and that is why he made it to where he did in his lifetime. It was great to read this as I settled in to bed. 

I haven’t had too many telling me not to follow certain goals. I think those voices for me have more been in my own head. I am learning how to hang a “Do Not Disturb! Brilliant Mind at Work!” sign on the door of my mind for those thoughts that try to distract or keep me from my dreams and aspirations.

Adam

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If you want to find a deeper meaning in your life, you won’t find it in the opinions or the beliefs that have been handed to you. Rather than trying to be what everyone else expects you to be, live your life by your own rules to be happy and find inner peace.

Your imagination is your own fertile field for growing any seedlings that you choose to plant for a future harvest.

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You may have been told that you have always been a dreamer, as if this were a fault. I can speak here from experience. Family, friends, teachers, and even advisors frequently disparaged ideas that burned brightly in my imagination. I often heard comments such as, “Wayne, you’re such a dreamer. Get real. You are never going to make it as a writer, or a television performer, or a movie personality. Be realistic—we know what’s best for you.”

When I was being discharged from the Navy at the age of 22, my superiors warned me that starting college at my “advanced age” was loaded with uncertainty, particularly since I had no higher education experience, and I would be competing with younger recent high school graduates. Since I already had a skill as a cryptographer in the Navy, they advised me to pursue what they felt was best for me. But I had a dream—an imagination filled with the idea of teaching, writing, and speaking to large audiences. I saw myself onstage. I saw myself as a prominent author. And this vision could not and would not be sabotaged by someone else’s vision of what I should or could become.

As a young boy in a foster home, I almost always ignored other people’s ideas about what I should be thinking or doing—I simply was indifferent to their opinions regarding what I could imagine for myself. I have carried this kind of inner discipline regarding my own imagination with clarity, refusing to allow external opinions to cancel or diminish what for me was hallowed ground.

Many years later, I was advised that acting in a movie was not sensible for me as a 68-year-old man with no acting experience. I once again remembered to hang the DO NOT DISTURB sign at the entrance to my imagination, and proceeded to take acting lessons and adopt the self-enforced regimen that allowed me to create a movie. It is a product that fills me with pride—all because I have diligently practiced the following rule:

Never, and I mean never, allow anyone else’s ideas of who you can or can’t become sully your dream or pollute your imagination. This is your territory, and a KEEP OUT sign is a great thing to erect at all entrances to your imagination.

Stay in a state of grace and gratitude for this resplendent gift that is always yours to do with as you choose.

— Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

Leave a Trail

"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

"If you want a thing bad enough" ~Les Brown

!!MEMORIZE THIS!! 

 

"If you want a thing bad enough to go out and fight for it,

to work day and night for it, to give up your time, 

your peace and sleep for it… 

if all that you dream and scheme is about it,

…and life seems useless and worthless without it… 

if you gladly sweat for it and fret for it and plan for it 

and lose all your terror of the opposition for it…

if you simply go after that thing that you want 

with all your capacity, strength and sagacity, 

faith hope and confidence and stern pertinacity…

if neither cold, poverty, famine, nor gout, 

sickness nor pain, of body and brain, 

can keep you away from the thing that you want…

if dogged and grim you beseech and beset it, 

with the help of God, 

YOU WILL GET IT!" 

– Les Brown

Excerpts from No Man's Land

Some quick and easy reminders while here in No Man's Land. We are a bit more on our own. Are shiny quit has been forgotten by others and the day to day struggle is wearing off to where when a crave does sneak up on us, we think "I should be over this"...and you feel embarrassed that you need help! Never have fear to get support! No matter how long you've been quit!!

Adam

"take a deep and honestly look at your past life... your life as a smoker and compare it to what your life is like now... and what it will be like in the future. You have to develop that vision of your future, of the person that you are going to BECOME now that you have freed yourself. You have to believe in yourself. You have to love yourself enough to deny yourself your addiction. 

Never never never question your decision to quit! This is the most loving thing that you will ever do for yourself. A few days of discomfort in exchange for a lifetime of freedom. You will never find another deal like it. Protect your quit. Don't smoke, no matter what."

KTFQ
Adam

Autobiography in Five Short Chapters ~Portia Nelson~

listened to Wayne Dyer and his 10 tips to success in life.

His #9 was "Walk Down Another Street"

He had become friends with the woman who wrote the poem 'Autobiography in 5 short chapters'. Her name is Portia Nelson and she is actually from Seattle, where I'm from.

His #10 tip was "Don't die with your music still inside you"

This is a subject I've been thinking a lot about lately. I know I still have so much to share but my life feels it is being wasted in this limbo of addiction. It is truly time to take that other street and I know I am on it

I am honestly so touched by these things and these teachings. I feel like the universe is speaking to me and showing me the road map to my future. It's so cool to see how profound this poem is to Wayne, to my friend Cara who showed it to me and that it's what she's been trying to get through to me.

It's all coming together.

Adam

D4
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"Autobiography In Five Short Chapters"

by Portia Nelson

Chapter 1

I walk down the street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I fall in,

I am lost, I am helpless,

It isn’t my fault.

It takes forever to find my way out.

Chapter 2

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I pretend I don’t see it.

I fall in again.

I can’t believe I am in the same place.

But it isn’t my fault.

It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter 3

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I see it there.

I still fall in; it’s a habit.

My eyes are open.

I know where I am.

It’s my fault.

I get out immediately.

Chapter 4

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I walk around it.

Chapter 5

I walk down another street.

Quitting smoking,

living smoke-free, and 

recovering from nicotine addiction 

involve walking down another street.

Quitting Mantra's (Wisdom for Recovering Smokers)

Wisdom for Recovering Smokers

From lancer071 on 10/30/2009 6:53:39 AM

Wisdom for Recovering Smokers 

Quitting is as repetitive a process as smoking. So, try to create new habits which do not include smoking. 

It's better to be an ex-smoker with an occasional desire to smoke, than a smoker with a constant desire to stop doing it. 

I DON'T SMOKE! 

Smoking is not an option. It's just no longer an option. 

The craving will pass whether you smoke or not. 

I'm a puff away from a pack a day. 

There is no such thing as just one cigarette. 

I am not deprived of anything by having quit smoking. In fact, it is the smokers who are deprived - of health, energy, money, confidence, peace of mind, courage, tranquility, freedom, and self-respect. 

We only have one day to not smoke in. Today. 

Don't envy smokers and bemoan the fact that you no longer are one. Start seeing them as the miserable creatures they really are and pity them. You wouldn't envy a heroin addict. 

Someday I'll find it hard to believe that I ever smoked. 

The cravings do diminish with time. HANG IN THERE! 

Own your quit. 

It's takes practice to become an experienced former smoker. 

Hang Tuff! Don't Puff! 

You're GREAT! You don't smoke anymore!! You don't HAVE to smoke. 

Smoking is a choice. 

Quitting is a process, not a single act. 

The URGE to smoke does pass! 

Craving - Nicodemon - BITE ME! 

Remember your discomforts (of quitting - the first few days)...They are valuable in order to stay quit! 

H.A.L.T. - Don't get too hungry, angry, lonely or tired. 

There are better companions than cigarettes! 

REWARD YOURSELF! Notice how you are improving!! 

Tell yourself, "I've ended the habit, just not the addiction".....(to stay off cigs). 

Drink lots of water in those first few weeks, and take deep breaths and slow exhales when the cravings hit. 

Don't be afraid to quit, rather be afraid NOT to quit. 

There is no way out but through. 

I can get up in the morning and take a deep breath without that tightness or coughing. 

My house smells great. 

Congratulate yourself on the fact that you have STOPPED, not on "having a go" or "another try". YOU HAVE STOPPED SMOKING. 

You should feel FANTASTIC about yourself because you no longer smoke; it's the best thing you will never ever do again! 

One is too many, and a thousand is never enough! 

"Not One, Not now, Not ever" 

Theres always money in my pocket. 

You can do this, you are doing it, one day at a time. 

Practice stress reduction techniques. 

'Progress, Not Perfection' 

You have to gain 75lbs to do the same level of damage to yourself as a pack-a-day habit will. 

Confidence is nice, but doing the foot-work is better. Confidence is the RESULT of accomplishment, and my money goes on the one who's got blisters 

Once you stop smoking the tendency is to blame everything that goes wrong on the fact that you have quit. 

No thank you, I don't smoke! 

"If I light up now, eventually I'll have to quit again.... who the heck wants to go through that again?--NOT ME!!!" 

Being quit for a year is just a long string of one day at a time quits put together. 

In restaurants always remember to say: "Non-smoking, please." 

In the end, you will be very swollen from the steriods you're on to keep what's left of your air passages open. You will have an oxygen tube hanging from your face, and you won't be able to go anywhere w/ out it. Your fingers, lips, toes, feet will all be purple, and your skin will have little to no color left to it. At the very end, you will be so oxygen deprived that you will not be able to form a coherent sentence, or even recognize those people who love you most in this world. You will be gasping for air. 

Say it out loud - "Today I am proud of ME!" 

Whatever it takes to stay smober. 

It was a long walk into the woods, its a long walk out. 

When you have a craving or a smoking thought, confront it, face it and don't hide or try to avoid it. 

When you have a craving, ask yourself what if anything triggered it? what are you going to do instead? and, the hard one for most smokers, how do I feel about the trigger and how do I feel right now in general? 

Everytime you think a cigarette will stop a craving, imagine a heroin junkie pathetically spiking his/her arm with a syringe. Is that really helping their situation? Will a cigarette really help yours? 

---The NOT AN OPTION list: 

1. "JUST ONE" is not an option. 

2. "NOT BECOMING UN-ADDICTED" is not an option. 

3. "NOT ACCEPTING YOUR ADDICTION" is not an option. 

4. "WALLOWING IN SELF PITY AND AMBIVALENCE" is not an option 

5. "DOING IT OVERNIGHT OR WITH MAGICAL TRICKS" is not an option. 

6. "GETTING HOOKED AGAIN" is not an option. 

7. "TO QUIT QUITTING" is not an option. 

8. "TRYING TO DO IT ALONE" is not an option. 

9. "TO SURRENDER BEFORE GIVING IT A BATTLE" is not an option. 

10. "TO SAY THAT I CAN'T DO IT is not an option. 

Slipping is not an option. 

Skip don't Slip; Keep the Quit. 

Be more and more focused on living life,and less focused on how you need to change. 

Don't smoke no matter what ... no matter what don't smoke! 

Whatever you decide will work --- will in fact work. 

The Q LIFE: read the information in the library, don't smoke, check out the news section, don't smoke, read the posts, don't smoke, reply to the posts, don't smoke, post your own, don't smoke, chat, don't smoke, post, don't smoke, read some more, don't smoke, drink water, don't smoke, go for a walk, don't smoke, call a friend, don't smoke, have a bubble bath, don't smoke....do whatever you want to do EXCEPT smoke!!! That's out of the question!! 

If having problems, keep asking yourself "How is smoking going help this problem." It won't. Don't smoke! 

To everyone who is just starting to feel the benefits of quitting: smoking is pretty disgusting when you're a non-smoker. It hurts, it makes you splutter, it tastes bad. Smoking will never be the way you remember it, because you aren't used to it any more. 

If you fail to prepare, be prepared to fail

Robert Frost Quote

"The best way out is always through."

~Robert Frost

This goes the same with the quit. In the end, their is only one way to conquer this addiction. Sooner or later you realize you are an addict and you have to stop putting nicotine in every form into your body. Their is no other way about it, no special pill or potion or pathway. The only person that can blaze the path is yourself....so do it....do it...DO IT!

Henry Ford Quote...

"Whether you think you can or think you can't...it's true!"

~Henry Ford

Desire Outwits Mother Nature...

"Through some strange and powerful principle of "mental chemistry" which she has never divulged, nature wraps up in the impulse of STRONG DESIRE "that something" which recognizes no such word as impossible, and accepts no such reality as failure."

(on building desire and faith)
"...Conduct yourself just as you would, if you were ALREADY IN POSSESSION OF THE MATERIAL THING THAT YOU ARE DEMANDING, when you call upon your subconscious mind....it will transmute into its physical equivalent..."

~Napoleon Hill

'Think and Grow Rich'

Napoleon Hill

"Whatever your mind can conceive and believe you can achieve" 

~Napoleon Hill 

(Do yourself a favor and read the book "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill!)

My Favorite Quote!

Until one is committed
there is hesitancy
the chance to draw back,
always ineffectiveness.

Concerning all acts of
initiative there is
one elementary truth,
the ignorance of which
kills countless ideas
and splendid plans:

That the moment one
definitely commits oneself
then Providence
moves too.

All sorts of things occur
to help one that would otherwise
never have occurred.
A whole stream of events
issues from the decision
raising in one`s favor
all manner of incidents and meetings
and material assistance
which no man would have
believed would have come.

Whatever you think you can do
or believe you can do;
begin it.
Action has magic, grace,
and power in it.

W.H. Murray

Source: The Scottish Himalaya Expedition

2 Good Quit Quotes

" EVERYTHING I do today is either a step
toward recovery or a step toward relapse...
So I need to watch my step today".


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"EVERY cigarette I EVER smoked
was a desperate attempt to get BACK
to the way I felt BEFORE
I smoked that very first one!"

~found on Quitnet!