Dang, I had a horribly intense dream that had convinced me that I had smoked. I felt I was ignoring Quitnet because I wasn't facing that I had relapsed. I even felt I had woken from the dream and that I truly had smoked. I think that's what actually freaked me out enough to wake my ass up.
The smoking nightmares have happened the last few days. I think queues in life remind my subconscious and it plays out in a dream. I am dating a girls that smokes and drinks. She doesn't always do it around me, but I still see it and smell it. It's weird that when I finally quit smoking and drinking, I start dating a girl that does both. The last 4 or 5 girls I've dated were non-smokers.
So thankful to be smoke and drink free and I will keep pressing forward. I'm not going back to that huge mess that gets us nowhere and makes us feel less than ourselves. When things like this happen I like to renew my vows and refocus. I will not "slip" back into old habits. I'm never going back to that personal hell of self-slavery and hate.
Have a great smoke free day!
Adam
You are inspiring, sir!!
ReplyDelete